So Happy ToGether!

I've been under some new stress this year.  

Not all running related, but some of it is...  I have come to realize that I put huge amounts of pressure on myself to perform.  To be Galactically BadA**.  To Not Suck.  To not....  disappoint my coaches.  

Weird, right?  

Not sure what they would say about that.  Still, that pressure leads to fear and anxiety.  It's lead to my not enjoying my running as much.  It's not their fault, I don't blame the ones I love for my fear.  

And I do love my coaches.  

I love hearing what they think, gleaning their wisdom, and knowing that knowing them is making me a stronger runner one footstrike at a time.  I love that they'll hang back with me, they'll check in, they'll leave me in the dust.  All appropriate in the moment.

Last week, at the beach, I decided to it was time to let some of the fear go.  I don't run for my coaches.  I run for me.  I don't run for The Marathon.  I run for me.  

I don't run...

I run.

Yesterday MTTographer caught me on film.  It's probably my favorite running photo this year.
Not because I've had an offer from Victoria's Secret.
Well, it is only Sunday....  

I love the photo because my eyes look happy.  The joy that I find in running is right there, for anyone to see.

I love running.  Running doesn't care how fast or slow we go.  Running enjoys the moment.  Running likes to be savored.  Running appreciates that some days are about maximum effort, and some days are about recovery.  Running empowers me to be stronger than my weak mind.

We have several months to go before The Marathon ~said in the big movie announcer voice~ and I need to find a way to culture my relationship with running. To do that, I need to banish the fear.

I need to reclaim the faith.

I need to run more.

Taper Madness

My gmail calendar just sent a new, "Shared Event Reminder" from my H's calendar:

MARATHON MADNESS - ALL DAY

10 days until Richmond Marathon

and I just have to think that I'm not as cool as I think I am...

Or that Taper Madness is like an infectious protein I learned about in Microbiology...

but probably I'm just not as cool as I think I am.

Guest Blogger: Jenny "Silver"

Jenny, of MTT Silver is the author of the blog Small Beginnings.

So when g. emailed me about writing a guest post on this blog I was so excited, but nervous. First I couldn’t believe that she would want me, as I am a beginning runner with absolutely no experience, to write something. Then I started to think about how much I have to learn, how I love visiting this blog because I’m so curious about anything running related, whether it’s to check out the cute skirts they always wear or hear some good training advice.

So I was responding that I would love to write a post, and was sharing a little about my training. This month on the novice schedule the miles are starting to get higher and it’s kinda intimidating. Saturday we run 12 miles, for some reason I had thought it was 11. It’s only one extra mile, which really isn’t that much but it freaked me out a bit. Then I knew what I wanted to write about. Fear.

I think we as humans are so fearful. I am definitely guilty of it. Whenever I run a new distance there is a part of me that wonders if I will really make it? Will I be the one that collapses on Grove Avenue and they have to call someone to come pick me up?

But then I think back to a couple months ago, when I was training for the Monument Avenue 10k. I vividly remember thinking “I may not make it to 6.2 miles by April 2!” And then I remember running my first 10k on February 1^st, 2 months before the race. And that race was simply amazing, I remember running across that finish line feeling like a million bucks. My mom and husband cheering for me, both amazed that I ran that much. The crowd, everything about that morning was almost surreal. And I did it. I made it.

So I say to myself “You didn’t think you could run that far and you did, so you can do this as well.” And every time I make it. Am I the fastest one on my team? No, I’m not. In fact I am one of the slower ones, but that’s okay. Because I’m doing this, I’m overcoming my fears.

I’ve learned that runners are not absent of fear. Before I became one I thought they were always confident and so sure of themselves. I know this isn’t true, and that’s okay. I think the key is not giving into fear. Not letting it rule your choices, because I think so many people miss out on so much because they are afraid to even try.

I am reminded of a quote by Henry Ford “Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you are right.” It’s so true. If you believe that you can do something, and of course put in the time and effort and do what your coaches tell you to do, you will make it. Don Garber recently sent out an email about the Half Marathon training team that started this past Saturday. He said if you are doing all your runs now you will make it to the Marathon. I needed to hear that, because there was apart of me that secretly wanted to switch. Nobody would blame me, I’ve never run a half marathon before and so it would still be a challenge. But, I knew I would regret it. Because my real goal is the marathon.

I think overcoming fear will always be apart of training. Even if it’s 5 years from now when I’m a mom, and just worried about not having the time to train, or I am trying to set a new PR. But I don’t want to live my life by giving into it. I always think about what it will feel like to cross that finish line on November 12. That date has been in my calendar since April. I know the feeling of reaching that goal once, crossing that finish line and knowing I have defeated my fears is simply amazing, and I want it again. It’s worth the risk, the unknown and the doubts to say “yeah, I ran a marathon, yup that’s 26.2 miles.”